I can't count the times I've tried to post unsuccessfully in the past two weeks. Sometimes Blogger really makes me crazy.
Things have been pretty great lately. I've been enjoying this summer and the time it has allowed me to visit with friends and family. It's amazing how much I've missed working full time in the past. I realize how lucky I am to have this time. I think about it every day. I know it won't last much longer and that makes it all the more precious to me.
(Before I go on I want to tell you I DID get the memo about life not being fair. I'm not complaining. Just venting.)
Is it strange that the only thing that really angers me anymore about this whole divorce situation anymore is the fact that I will have to put Natalie in some form of daycare while I return to work? I don't mind going back to work, I've worked my entire life.
I mind leaving my daughter with someone else all day long.
I mind trusting someone else to do a big portion of the job that I've waited and planned and sacrificed for.
I mind that I quit a job I loved a mere two months before this whole thing went down.
I mind not having a choice in the matter.
I know there are much worse things than this. I know this works for millions of people, it even works well. It's just...I didn't want this. That's the part that bothers me. But, it is what it is. I just have to get used to my new normal. I have to believe that, at some point, this will be okay for me. And I do believe it. I mean, if someone had told me six months ago just how OKAY I would be in July I would have laughed them out of town. So I really do know it will be fine. In the meantime we're going to have a fantastic summer!
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Camery you can vent your heart out to me! I can't say I understand, but in a way I know what you mean. When I worked while we were in Virginia and took Ethan there I had a hard excepting that I wasn't going to be a full time stay at home mom that I've always dreamed of becoming. I know your time will come when that will most likely be an option in your life. Any guy who ends up with you will be the luckiest man alive! You are awesome on so many levels! And Natalie is just an extra bonus! She is a beautiful and fun baby and no one could've asked for more. Life sucks a lot...but with the economy the way it is I'm afraid everyone will have to work in order to get by with the luxuries they have or used to have. Keep your head up love!
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