The End

Well, this blog is officially over. And as of next Friday, so is my marriage. It still blows my mind at how life is working itself out. I mourn the family I had and the family unit Natalie will never know in the way I had intended for her. It has been more than seven years since I've been a single gal. In the beginning I was literally petrified with fear at the very thought of being a single mom. But not anymore. Daishan once said, "See, you can do hard things." And she was right, I can do this. Thanks for sharing the journey with me. Your words of encouragement have meant more than you could ever know. I have been blessed to have so many supportive friends in my life. Thank you for sticking with me, I wouldn't have wanted to do this alone.

Side note:
Natalie ran away with and destroyed an entire page of your email addresses. In addition to that, some of you left your blog addresses for me instead of your email addresses. If you would like to be added to our new blog, and I haven't done so for you already, just leave your address as a comment on this post.

Oh dear, what a family reunion...

Beth has been plotting for almost a year in an attempt to get me to the family reunion this summer. In the beginning I was simply humoring her. I honestly had no idea how that one was really going to happen. I was broke. Living on the entirely opposite side of the state. And had a small baby. But, the closer it came to reunion time, the more I could see I was sort of stuck with my original answer.
She had thought of everything and all my arguments were futile.
Thursday night Shasta came over and we left for Lake Curlew bright and early Friday morning. One thing I didn't count on was the complete lack of radio reception for most of the drive. Since I only had four decent CD's in my car, the two of us now have every Colbie Caillat, Dixie Chicks, Taylor Swift and Toby Keith song memorized. Natalie's first words may very well be, "It starts in my toes and I crinkle my nose." Let's hope that's not the case, but I honestly wouldn't be surprised. We heard it a LOT.
Luckily we made the first ferry ride over. The ferry was the equivalent of a small flatbed trailer and ours was loaded with two RV's and four cars. I distinctly remember hearing the man loading us on say to the driver behind me, "Keep coming, you still have about two inches." It was a FULL ride and as we approached the other side, I mentioned to Shasta how it was looking like we might hit the dock pretty hard. She seemed pretty certain we wouldn't and even explained to me how the captain (or whatever a ferry driver is called) would be pulling back and taking a number of precautions to avoid hitting anything. Moments later, we careened into the dock. So much for your theory, Shasta.
We finally found the resort and there are hardly words to express our surprise at what we found. So, I will skip most of it and only say this: our accommodations kept us dry, and warm, and allowed us the opportunity to reconnect with our Cherokee ancestors.
The seven of us managed just fine, and it really wasn't so bad once we were settled in a bit. Some of my favorite features in our "waterfront studio" included: the toilet seat that seriously only came to the middle of my shin, our beautiful bedside lamp, and the fact that we shared one water heater with the other three studios, AND the laundry room.
There was literally NO cell reception at the resort. This was annoying but not nearly as bad for me as it was for the teenage population. There were literally little swarms of kids roaming around with their phones held out, desperate to find ANY reception. Some found success by touching tall metal poles, or out on the dock, and one cousin swore that if you had Verizon and put your phone in a certain hole of a certain telephone pole you could make a short phone call. Seriously?
The reunion was really pretty fun. It was nice to see so many family members and to catch up on their lives. I went tubing with Stephanie and Shasta, took a beautiful, although freezing, walk with Natalie, Shasta and Beth, watched a deer swim across the lake, and ate some pretty good food.
Andrew came with us on the ride home and the time seemed to go so much faster with him there to tell his stories and entertain us. I still can't believe he's all grown up. I remember Dusty getting beat with a wooden spoon for letting Andrew eat his Crayola markers. And then I realize it's been twenty years...I'm still adjusting to the transition of becoming a grown up.
I have posted a very small smattering of photos from the trip and hopefully you can gleam a bit of the experiences from them. I really am glad we made it, it had been more than ten years since I've been to a reunion on that side so I was more than due for one. Natalie LOVED playing with the kids, practicing her walking skills in a new environment, and getting incredibly dirty every single day, and there's no way I would have believed Beth's stories had I not been there myself! :)

Do we have many memories?

So, I have seen this post on a few people's blogs lately and I just couldn't pass it up because it seemed kind of fun so please bear with me and please post a comment!!!

Tag....your it! And then do it on your blog! It will be fun, I promise.

1.Place a comment on my blog about a memory that you and I had together. It doesn't matter if we knew/know each other well or not, just a memory that you have of me. Then...
2. Post these same instructions on your blog and I promise, I will leave a favorite memory I have had of you!

It will be fun to see how many people leave a comment and what they remember!

T-Minus One Month

Hey Everyone!

When Natalie turns one (which is in only a month!) I will no longer be posting on this blog. I will start a new blog, with a new name, and I'm contemplating a private setting. If you would like to be invited to view the new blog, please comment with your email address so I can get you added. I will delete your address from comments once I get the information so you won't have to worry too much about random people getting your address. In the event I don't go private, at least I'll have a really updated address book, right?

Thanks!

WWJ or JD?

Today I went and picked raspberries from my friend's garden.
My original intention was to make freezer jam in a large enough quantity to sustain me for an entire year.
My next intention was to make enough to sustain me through the winter.
My final intention, the one I made once I began actually picking the berries, was simply to make ONE batch of freezer jam. You see, this was my first year picking solo and let me tell you what a difference a few helpers can make.
I started out with plenty of enthusiasm for the task at hand but it quickly began to fade. Then something kind of funny happened. Instead of bemoaning the heat or the bugs or the scratchy branches, my only thought was, "What would Jane or Julie do?" I just knew if I could think like one of them, I would have raspberries galore in no time flat. These women are two of the smartest cookies I know, and they both know a lot about almost everything. I'll bet that if it were possible to combine their collective knowledge, they might actually know everything. However, I've never actually picked ANYTHING with Jane, so I couldn't think of what she would do, and I knew Julie wouldn't be dumb enough to come without at least a couple of her kids to help. But when all was said and done I THINK I collected enough berries for two batches.
So, I get home, do a few things around the house, come around the corner, and see my brother literally shoveling handfuls of my precious berries into his mouth. In his defense, he did watch Natalie so I could go picking so I guess he earned a few handfuls. But if I come up short on that second batch you know who I'm going to blame...
Jane, for not blogging something on how to most efficiently pick raspberries.
Julie, for not reading my mind and offering to pick raspberries while she and her little pickers were in town, AND Josh for eating half of my profits!

P.S. Happy belated Birthday, Jane!

Family Reunion

A couple of weekends ago, we went to Grandma Judy's family reunion. It was especially nice because Chris and Shani were there. Even though they had been dating for...ever, I had only met Shani a few weeks earlier in Vegas. She is such a fun girl! Now they are married and I'm so happy for them!
Natalie was quite the social butterfly and was literally crawling up to strangers and asking them to pick her up. I only posted two of the probably five pictures I caught of her with her new friends. I guess we'll have to spend a little more time on the issue of "stranger danger" in the near future!
The weather was great and it was fun to visit with people I don't see on a very regular basis. Of course, I only got pictures with the ones I see every weekend but, what can you do?

Small personal vent.

I can't count the times I've tried to post unsuccessfully in the past two weeks. Sometimes Blogger really makes me crazy.
Things have been pretty great lately. I've been enjoying this summer and the time it has allowed me to visit with friends and family. It's amazing how much I've missed working full time in the past. I realize how lucky I am to have this time. I think about it every day. I know it won't last much longer and that makes it all the more precious to me.
(Before I go on I want to tell you I DID get the memo about life not being fair. I'm not complaining. Just venting.)
Is it strange that the only thing that really angers me anymore about this whole divorce situation anymore is the fact that I will have to put Natalie in some form of daycare while I return to work? I don't mind going back to work, I've worked my entire life.
I mind leaving my daughter with someone else all day long.
I mind trusting someone else to do a big portion of the job that I've waited and planned and sacrificed for.
I mind that I quit a job I loved a mere two months before this whole thing went down.
I mind not having a choice in the matter.
I know there are much worse things than this. I know this works for millions of people, it even works well. It's just...I didn't want this. That's the part that bothers me. But, it is what it is. I just have to get used to my new normal. I have to believe that, at some point, this will be okay for me. And I do believe it. I mean, if someone had told me six months ago just how OKAY I would be in July I would have laughed them out of town. So I really do know it will be fine. In the meantime we're going to have a fantastic summer!